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What If Al Gore Had Lived In Ancient Greece?

Long, long ago in a Grecian city far, far away there lived a man named Albertus Goreus. While most of his class of citizens were content with their lives, Albertus felt unloved. And, so, one summer's day as he sat upon the steps of the temple of Zeus, he noticed how warm the air was. Albertus stared at the sun. How bright it shone! He could feel the heat pouring from the giant, golden orb of Apollo. Ten minutes later, as he was being carried away from the temple because he had stared at the sun to long, he thought, "Oh, my! The world will be burnt to a crisp if I don't do something about it!"... READ MORE

Jimmy Carter Has A New Mission In Life...

But you know how Jimmy is, always wanting to prove that he's right and that he wasn't the absolute worst president in history. That's right. The founder of Habitat For Humanity has a new organization that he will unveil soon. An organization which will help battle the effects of Global Warming AND the carelessness of humans. I think Jimmy should explain, so here's former President Jimmy Carter... READ MORE

The White House Dog Pageant

The First Family should be getting a new puppy sometime soon and the media seems to be going gaga over this tidbit of news. So, I'm going to jump on the bandwagon. Through a White House contact I have been directed to pictures of the puppy nominees. Here are their respective pictures with a brief description of their traits and qualities... READ MORE

Al Gore's Handy "How To Save The Planet Studyguide"

Hello, you all know me, I'm Al Gore the friendly CEO of the Eco-Movement! Like the biotch, I mean, Secretary of State, said, we need to correct our past mistakes and save our Earth from the dreadful possibility of more Spring-like days... READ MORE

GM's New Line Of Cars Are A Little Strange...

With the recent General Motor's stock grab by the United States government and the United Auto Worker's Union, there will be a few minor changes to the company... The production of gasoline powered automobiles will cease, as of now. New, cleaner cars have been produced, and you will see them very soon at your local car dealership. Here are a few... READ MORE

Most of us regular folk have a relative or two that is embarrassing. But, hey, United States Presidents are not immune to them either.

I previously wrote about John F. Kennedy's embarrassing brother Ted, but I realized that his family is literally a gold mine of crazed relatives! I could not pass up this opportunity to further delve into this family.

First of all, we will leave out the fact that JFK himself was an embarrassment. Due to the fact that his alleged affairs with women like Marilyn Monroe AND his alleged illegal drug binges are not proven, I will leave his conduct up to you to decide.


We will start with the man that started it all, Joseph P. Kennedy Senior. What a guy! He loved to cheat on his wife (a trait that seems to have run in the family, eh?). Famous Hollywood actress Gloria Swanson was one of his conquests. He allegedly wanted to have a child with her.

Then, in his spare time, he would return home to his wife Rose and impregnate her. Apparently Rose liked this arrangement and never complained.

Joseph was smart enough to donate huge amounts of dough to FDR's Presidential Campaign. FDR promptly rewarded Joseph with a post in the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission. In 1938 he became Ambassador to the United Kingdom (Court of St. James). This was an important position in not only was this America's friend, but also Nazi Germany was knocking on their door- and they weren't selling frankfurters. He then managed to alienate the entire British Isles and the U.S. with this gem of a thought, "Democracy is finished in England. It may be here." And this was the father of a president and two senators?

I saw a little anecdote about him that may or may not be true. During the time of Germany's Air Raids, British officials called him a coward for his tendency to run to an air raid shelter at any sign of an airplane. They dubbed him "Jittery Joe".

I'm sure he just could not figure out why he was told to resign. . .

As a side note, it is commonly declared among Democratic circles that during the Great Depression most people here in America were jobless and poor. I assumed that most businessmen were down on their luck also. Read this article from Wikipedia.

It has been noted that during the Depression Kennedy vastly increased his financial fortune by investing most of his fortune in real estate. In 1929 Kennedy's fortune was estimated to be $4 million. By 1935, his wealth had increased to $180 million. According to Time Magazine, Kennedy survived the crash “because he possessed a passion for facts, a complete lack of sentiment and a marvelous sense of timing."

Brother Robert is JFK's virtual twin. Though you won't see this in any Wikipedia article on Robert Kennedy, I firmly believe that he was a womanizer, too. He had a wife and a large family to attend, but he always kept his eyes on the single ladies. Marilyn Monroe was supposedly a "lady friend".

And, yes, these two brothers (allegedly) had an affair with the same woman. Hey, at least they learned to share.

Robert is also one of the last people to have seen Marilyn before she died. He apparently was trying to end their affair. She was threatening to go to the press. This is a big reason why some people suspect that she was murdered. Take note that this is unsubstantiated. I personally believe that everyone is innocent until proven guilty. . . But, I'm a hypocrite. I don't put anything past the Kennedys.

I've already discussed Edward "Ted" Kennedy in my last post. Yet I feel I must reveal a often overlooked fact. Of all the Kennedy men who had extramarital affairs, only Ted's first wife Joan left him. I think she couldn't "grin and bear it" any longer.

So, to put this into perspective, from this one family we've had:

1 United States President
2 Ambassadors
1 Attorney General
3 Senators
2 Congressmen

And people still call the time of the Kennedy Administration "Camelot"?!?

2 Responses so far.

  1. Anonymous says:

    The only,and I mean only thing that can be said about JFK and Bobby Kennedy is, they both hated the mob,communist,lowered taxes, and streamed lined the military.

    Other than that, the rest of the family is made up of leftard-appeasers,drunken playboys,and spoiled bimbos.

  2. Great post. That graphic of JFK is creepy with the raising brows.

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